Hello Family! :)
I have to tell the truth, this week
has been a hard one for me...but I am continuing to endure to the end! :) I
told you how I had a headache last week? Well it still hasn't gone away...my
whole back hurts and my neck and it causes my head to hurt too. I was also sick
this week, haha! I am falling apart! :-P I think I just caught a little bug,
but I felt like I was going to puke on most days. We got to see Gary this week,
he is doing ok :) He had to go to Oklahoma on Saturday to say goodbye to his
dad. Poor guy has so much going on in his life, I just wish he would let God
help him and accept the gospel. But it was really good to see him. I'm sure you
are all waiting to hear about my new mission President and my feelings about
the Weavers leaving. Well on Wednesday we had a mini zone conference. President
told us some exciting news! They changed the way we teach now, instead of
teaching 4 lessons before baptism we are going to teach all 5 before baptism
and then instead of members being in charge of the new member lessons (aka
teaching them those 5 lessons again) we are in charge! They are encouraging us
to keep close contact with them for a year after baptism. So our new focus is
not only getting them to baptism, but also getting them to the temple! Which is
really really awesome :) I am excited! I don't remember if I told you, but Papa
Rich is going to the Temple on August 9th! Sister Hall will be in WA with her
family at that time, so it was perfect timing :) The rest of the meeting was
just testimonies. They talked about how the quorum of the 12 apostles all bore
their testimonies of Christ in a minute or less and it was super powerful! And
so we tried to do that, and it was so powerful. I was blubbering the whole
time. At the end they had us each one by one come and say goodbye, they gave us
a Washington quarter and hugged us. I was last haha and I just hugged them
both for the longest time! I have given up on trying to hold my tears in :)
haha I can't even express to you the affect that the Weavers have had on my
life. They were so supportive and for some reason, they believed in me and
trusted me. If I ever asked President something he treated it with such
importance. They are the most caring and loving people and I will forever
cherish them in my life. They loved so much, and it motivated me to be a better
person, and a much better missionary. Words cannot express how much I love them
or how much I will miss them. But I am so grateful for their example and the
way they brought me closer to my Savior, Jesus Christ. He is real. He lives! We
have such an amazing opportunity to access His love and Atonement. Do you
realize the power that we have because of the gospel of Jesus Christ?! It's
absolutely amazing! and it's real. Saying goodbye to the weavers was hard, but
because of Jesus Christ, we have the sacred opportunity to be with our loved
ones forever! There is no such thing as endings because of Him! I have not
met the Blatters yet, we have another mini zone conference tomorrow in which we
will meet them. We had a conference call last night and President Blatter
seemed to be really enthusiastic and loving. He told us this mission is the
greatest (of course he has to say that ;) ) and he's excited to be here. :) I
have a good feeling about them. So I'm excited to see what is in store! :) I
feel like he is going to have us focus on PMG even more even though we already
do a ton! :) I honestly don't even know what to tell you about this week! haha
I don't really remember much, my head is hurting and for some reason that gives
me amnesia:-P haha I think the most important thing this week are the lessons I
learned. In the Ensign from this month there's a talk about being perfect in
Christ. And it talks about how we are not going to be prefect in this life and
we need to stop putting ourselves down because we aren't perfect. :) Sister
Boone proceeded to tell me that I was a perfectionist. :) Yesterday in church
we talked about "chronic guilt" where we are doing our best but for
some reason we feel like it's not enough, like it's never going to be enough.
This is something that I have always struggled with, I always felt like what I
do will never be good enough. And that's because it won't! :) haha last night I
got a blessing from Brother Falter to help me feel better. The blessing told me
a lot of great things I needed to hear. such as the fact that Heavenly Father
is aware of my intentions, stresses, concerns and heart. And he also
expressed that Heavenly Father is proud of me and has an abundant love for me.
I have been pondering on that a lot. I think that one of the most important
things that we can learn is that we matter to Him! I read a talk
this morning by president Ucthdorf that really touched me it's
called "you matter to Him" from the 2011 conference here's
a little part:
My dear brothers and sisters, it may
be true that man is nothing in comparison to the greatness of the universe. At
times we may even feel insignificant, invisible, alone, or forgotten. But
always remember—you matter to Him! If you ever doubt that, consider these four
divine principles:
First, God loves the humble and
meek, for they are “greatest in the kingdom of heaven.”17
Second, the Lord entrusts “the fullness
of [His] gospel [to] be proclaimed by the weak and the simple unto the ends of
the world.”18 He has chosen
“the weak things of the world [to] come forth and break down the mighty and
strong ones”19 and to put to
shame “the things which are mighty.”20
Third, no matter where you live, no
matter how humble your circumstances, how meager your employment, how limited
your abilities, how ordinary your appearance, or how little your calling in the
Church may appear to you, you are not invisible to your Heavenly Father. He
loves you. He knows your humble heart and your acts of love and kindness.
Together, they form a lasting testimony of your fidelity and faith.
Fourth and finally, please
understand that what you see and experience now is not what forever will be.
You will not feel loneliness, sorrow, pain, or discouragement forever. We have
the faithful promise of God that He will neither forget nor forsake those who
incline their hearts to Him.21 Have hope and
faith in that promise. Learn to love your Heavenly Father and become His
disciple in word and in deed.
Be assured that if you but hold on,
believe in Him, and remain faithful in keeping the commandments, one day you
will experience for yourselves the promises revealed to the Apostle Paul: “Eye
hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the
things which God hath prepared for them that love him.”22
Brothers and sisters, the most
powerful Being in the universe is the Father of your spirit. He knows you. He
loves you with a perfect love.
God sees you not only as a mortal
being on a small planet who lives for a brief season—He sees you as His child.
He sees you as the being you are capable and designed to become. He wants you
to know that you matter to Him.
I learned this week that no matter
how sick we are, how incapable we feel, how much we can't get done because
there's not enough time in the day, we still matter to Him. We are enough
because we are trying. "men are that they might have joy"! In
this life I believe we are meant to have joy, and although saying goodbye to
the Weavers and tonight Jesus and Crystal are leaving to Texas,
investigators and people we meet don't always want to learn about the gospel,
we all go through discouragement and disappointment. But "weeping may
endure for a night, but joy cometh in the morning" I testify to
each of you that we are made to be a joyful and delightsome people! We are made
to smile! :) I think that because of my mission I will have a permanent
smile on my heart. It is such a sacred thing to preach the gospel. It is
truly wonderful. I am grateful that this week I still went out every day
all day to preach the gospel. Because it is supposed to be preached by the
simple, and weak. I continually ponder the scripture in Mosiah 4
11 And again I say unto you as
I have said before, that as ye have come to the knowledge of the glory of God,
or if ye have known of his goodness and have tasted of his love, and have
received a remission of your sins, which causeth such exceedingly great joy in
your souls, even so I would that ye should remember, and always retain in remembrance,
the greatness of God, and your own nothingness, and his goodness and
long-suffering towards you, unworthy creatures, and humble yourselves even in
the depths of humility, calling on the name of the Lord daily, and standing
steadfastly in the faith of that which is to come, which was spoken by the
mouth of the angel.
12 And behold, I say unto you that if ye do this ye
shall always rejoice, and be filled with the love of God, and always retain a
remission of your sins; and ye shall grow in the knowledge of the glory of him
that created you, or in the knowledge of that which is just and true.
We do not have to have "chronic
guilt" because of our weaknesses, because we have the Savior, Jesus
Christ! and His gospel which is so important that He himself came to the earth
to Restore it. and it truly "causes such exceedingly great joy in [our]
souls" And if we are humble, meek, submissive and full of love,
becoming as a little child, we will be filled with the love of God and retain a
remission of our sins! :) and always rejoice and grow in a knowledge of our
loving Heavenly Father. I am so grateful for Him. I am joyful because of Him! I
am so happy! Because this gospel is so wonderful and true! :)
I also really liked this video:
I know that each of us can be made
clean and while and complete and perfect through the Atonement of Christ. We do
NOT have to be perfect now and how merciful God is to us to send a Savior to
make it so. I am so grateful for my mission and all the things that it teaches
me. I am grateful for this gospel because it's true. I have faith that it
works, and I have hope that it works for me! :)
Other than that everything is going
well, Sister Boone and I still are getting along ok :) It's like literally
having a little sister. She is like a sour patch kid! Sour, then sweet! hahaha
But I love her :) and am learning a lot from her. Our investigator pool is slowly
dwindling in unbelief (haha not really I just like that phrase from the
scriptures) but it is dwindling! Summertime is hard for a lot of people, but we
are working hard to find new people to teach and coming up with good ways to
work to find them, especially working with members! Oh how I love the members
here! I have been so spoiled with wonderful ward members my entire mission! I
am so spoiled. God really does bless us way more than we deserve! There is no
way I could ever repay Him. Another part of my blessing last night talked about
the joy I will feel when I literally come unto Christ (aka stand in His
presence) which I loved because I've been obsessed with the "Come unto
Christ" song! :) But I am positive that I will feel an abundance of joy
when I come into the Savior's presence. And I can't even wait for that day when
I can see Him and my Heavenly Father again. I love the feeling I get in the
temple, because it makes me remember and feel of my homesickness for heaven. I
can't wait to come home and go as often as I want! :) I am so excited! We are
so blessed with wonderful resources to help us feel of the wonderful power of
the gospel and of our Heavenly Father's love, such as the temple, prayer,
church, and scriptures! I hope you each are taking advantage of the things God
has blessed us with to help us in our lives! :) I know that if we do, we can
always remember Him and always have His spirit to be with us! :) And oh what
joy and what glory we will experience when we have those things in our lives
(you know you've been on a mission for a while when you type certain lines of
the scriptures to describe your thoughts :) :D) Anyways, I hope y'all are doing
wonderfully! :) I love each of you more than you know. You are always in my
prayers and thoughts. Have a wonderful 4th of July week! :) Love you!
Love always
Sister Wilkins :)
READ THIS! :)
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